The Con started on Thursday, my friend Ryan and I covered the two main floors. When you first get to Comic-Con you can be completely overwhelmed by everything. Thursday is a good day to start. It is not as busy as it gets the rest of the weekend. It gives you time to have actual conversations with the artists and vendors.

Sapo Entertainment has been attending and participating in  the New York Comic-Con since it first started on February 24th, 2006. This year’s Comic-Con was the biggest yet. Navigating the con becomes an effort of divide and conquer. Once you have an idea what is where, you can make an effort to find what you’re looking for.

Most of the con is for the mass market. People in search of a sketch, autograph, or a collectible by a famous artist or star. Marvel, DC, Hasbro and all the other big companies I have no interest in. I am on the lookout for the new cool artists and designers. It is always the diamond in the rough I am looking for. Last year I made the discovery of WorryWoos, and brought Nola for my girlfriend’s sister’s daughter. This year I brought Wince . That ended my Thursday.

Saturday

Walking through the Artist Alley, I mostly saw people selling fan art of Spider-man, Batman, The Hulk, the X-men, Wonder Woman and Superman. While I find this rather boring, I understand why it turns out this way. Artists need to make money; a sketch of a character that no one knows is a lot harder to sell. The main source of income happens to be the big companies, Marvel and DC.

There are always exceptions. I was getting a bit disappointed trying to find the exceptions, until I came across the Red Rocket Farm – Jason Thomas booth.  Getting new inspiration I decided to give it a more thorough walk-through and found some very interesting artists. My favorites are Emi Boz, Imaginism Studios, Katie Cook, Laura Lee, Chad Spilker, Chris Hamer, Adam and Nick Hayes, Dave Rapoza, Jim McCann, Janet Lee, Sara Richard, Skeme Richards, Big Pimp Jones, Julia L Singh, Mike Maydak, Rory Smith- Blog, and Ant Lucia.

After my discoveries I headed over to meet and get my picture taken with Grover [put the photo here, maybe?]. Had I known the line was going to be so long, I would have arrived there earlier. After Grover’s autograph I came across a vendor called We Love Fine, I purchased a nice Gir sweatshirt from them.

I wandered over to the autograph section, where I made a Mark Hamill spotting. He was signing autographs for a long line of antsy people. The little boy inside of me wanted really badly to get his signature. The adult inside of me reminded me how much I hate lines. So no autograph for me. I also caught a glimpse of Peter Mayhew, Jewel Staite and Rose McGowan.

I spent the rest of my Saturday looking for the Uncanny X-force #8; I was very successful.

Sunday

The end of the con is always about clean up. My friend Luis Pons brought his camera, daughter Alana and friend Jubei Raziel.  We hit the main floor and I could tell Luis was over whelmed. So I thought the best place to start was the New Gen where they were hosting Mark Hamill and a group of creatures from their comic. We then crossed the floor on the look out for costumes. Luis got a bunch photos, before we hit the autograph section where the star wars fans seemed to be gathering. The day ended with Luis and his daughter taking photos with the two Bat mobiles and the Back to the Future Delorean.

Thanks
Sean “Sapo” Pisano

Below are other people and things I enjoyed at the con.

Other cool vendors include
welovefine.com
ohiyafriends.com
utilikilts.com
spudbottom.com
stylinonline.com
woolbuddy.com
http://littlepunkpeople.net/
http://www.feepingcreatures.com/
http://polyopticstoys.blogspot.com/
http://taggalleries.com/
Panic Buttons Pinbacks

Games
dystopiarising.com

Webcomics
http://www.digitalpimponline.com/
Suburban Fairy Tales

Other cool things
http://1xrun.com/
http://artwhino.com/
http://wowisthatyou.com/
Major League Mods
Instigatorzine

Podcasts
http://geekcentricity.com/
http://screenbums.com/

Shirts For a Cure
http://sfac.merchnow.com/

New Gen
http://newgenuniverse.com/

Geek Chic
http://www.geekchichq.com/

I got to the con a little ahead of time, and capitalized on my Artist’s (read as: Exhibitor’s) badge to get into the Exhibit Hall a little earlier than the General Public, and talk to some publishers, as well as track down those booths that I hadn’t been able to find in the mad press of Thursday. I met with a fair amount of success while doing this, and suddenly the gates opened, and the con was in full swing again. Friday was the only day that I had any actual gaming planned, my friends had made plans to play a round of True Dungeon, but I had even worked that into my schedule for Maximum Exposure.

My Cunning Plan for spending several hours at True Dungeon was to leave my portfolio at Wizards of the Coast, since they had instituted some new portfolio review procedures. Based on the emphasis on speedy turnaround (they either were going to call you in or not) leaving my portfolio with them to Yay or Nay during the several hours that I wouldn’t be actively using it seemed like the correct play. As my friend George put it, ‘If they’re handing out lotto tickets, you might as well take one.’

However, it turned out that there was a fairly sizable stack of portfolios ahead of mine when I handed mine off. While I don’t know how much farther they got through them in the time it was there, I ended up going back for it on Saturday, unreviewed, because being without it was preventing me from accomplishing my overall objective. I wasn’t thrilled about this snag, but it was the lesser of two evils.

On the upside, I met E. Foley of geeksdreamgirl.com en route to retrieving my portfolio, and got to ask her about her website. I had spied her from afar, and had been confused by her T-shirt, which bore the site’s mascot and the phrase ‘Are you Single’ We exchanged cards and talked about the joys of T-shirt marketing.

Anyhow, following some less-than-stellar True Dungeon capers, Melissa and I hung around for the Artist’s Reception, rubbed elbows and engaged in a bit of scrimmage for cheese.

It was good cheese, which explained the long line that formed for it.

We then caught up with our other friends, and loitered at the speakeasy, where a chance encounter with John Arcadian of Silvervine Games led to another job lead. I’d spoken with John sometime last year about doing some work on his upcoming book, but some personal issues got in the way, and we’d fallen out of touch. He was still excited about working together, so we talked about doing something in the future.

Finally, we rounded out the evening with a (very) late-night round of World of Darkness, which somehow we all managed to survive.

Armed with my matted prints, I got up, showered, shaved, put on my self-promotional tshirt and loaded my business card holder, and then I was off to the show.

Because of my mad leet Artist

nor this crowd...

nor this one, nor the mob inside the convention center.

Weaving my way through the crowds, I snagged my Artist’s Badge, and slipped into the Exhibit Hall, making my way towards the Artist’s area at the rear.

The Freedom of Movement that the Artist Badge provided also let me catch a shot of this guy.

Everything went fine… until I ran out of Velcro. The Velcro I’d bought was 15 sets of dots, 1 fluffy and 1 set of hooks, which at first glace would be enough for the 10 images I had to hang. BUT, in truth, it took 2 sets (2 hooks) to hang each piece, and ideally would have been 3, to prevent them from jutting out at the bottom. In a bit of a panic, I almost ended up fighting my way back through the eager crowd of VIGs, but was saved from having to do that by Joe Slucher and his Amazing Roll of Velcro. Joe had already hung all his work, and had plenty of Velcro to spare, for which I was I was probably not outwardly grateful enough, but seriously, he saved the day.

With my artwork hung (and since in my infinite, infinite wisdom, I forgot to take a picture of it, I guess you’ll just have to believe me), I spent a little time meeting and greeting people I knew in the Art Show, and observing those whom I didn’t.

Before... No, wait, just Before. Sorry.

I actually ended up spending a lot of time explaining that I only had panels in the Show, not a table, as many of the people who heard I was showing in the Art Show assumed the best of me. I was flattered that everyone thought enough of me to believe that I’d have had a table, but, things were what they were, so I splained like Ricky was about to go Babaloo upside my head. And as it was, without the table, I was free to wander the floor with my partner in Gen Con-related crime, Melissa Dowell.

Over the last few months, we had come up with A Plan of sorts, and while I waited for her flight to come in, I scouted the Hall, and figured out where our targets were, and showed my portfolio to some other people who for one reason or another (mostly lack of time for researching fully) had not made it onto our list in the process. Every so often, I stopped back at my display and refilled the business card holders. Each time that I returned, there was a fair amount of people looking at my work and smiling, or in one or two cases chuckling, so that boosted my spirits.

Without giving the complete play-by-play (which I don’t think I’m capable of doing anyway), Thursday passed in a blur of walking into booths, asking politely about freelancing with various companies, showing my portfolio, introducing myself and Melissa to people, and handing out cards. Other events of note include walking into the Wattsalpoag Games booth and sitting down to a rousing (and decisive) round of Claim It! with Mike Raabe, the Art Director there, and meeting the dancers of the Different Drummer Belly Dancing troupe, and being reassured that belly dancing guys were, in fact, sexy. I was intrigued, but the timing just didn’t work out over the course of the weekend.

Finally, the day came to a close and the adrenaline wore off. After a bite at the Steak n’ Shake near the convention center, we caught up with some friends, hung out at the speakeasy at Union Station for a while, then called it a night.

The best four days in blog posts.

For those of you either too young or too old to remember Pokemon, its central human protagonist, Ash Ketchum, leaves his comfortable home to embark on a mystical journey filled with friendly monsters, intense training, and lots of overland travel, all leading to his ultimate goal- becoming a Pokemon Master, a worthy career choice if there ever was one in that particular universe.

When you caught the original 150, you got a really sweet dental package.

In the anime, Viridian City is Ash’s first stop on his journey, hence the title of this post. My journey to Gen Con was similar, except I don’t have any Pokeballs, and I’m not trying to get anyone to learn special attacks. Okay, so it’s not the best of metaphors, (I originally came up with it while half-asleep en route to the airport, and it sort of stuck in my head,) but I made a long (albeit significantly less perilous) journey in the interests of advancing my career, which up until this point has also featured imaginary monsters, too.

“I’m on the road to Viridian City
Meet my friends along the way (I’m on the road!)
I’m on the road to Viridian City
I got a badge and the power to play“
-From “The Road to Viridian City,” a track on “2BA Master”

Leg 1: Subway to Grand Central Station
Aside from a crowded 4 train platform, there was little to report. It was typical New York City rush hour subway congestion. I left on time, and arrived at Grand Central Station with time to spare.

Leg 2: Metro-North to White Plains
I picked up a lemon poppy seed muffin at Junior’s, and ate it on the train. The train went express, so there was not much opportunity to take photos of the scenery as it raced past. The train out to White Plains was surprisingly crowded for a 9AM-ish train out of Manhattan, but nowhere near the density of the subway. There was little to do but sit and start typing this, but before I knew it, I was at White Plains.

Leg 3: Bus from Metro-North Station to Airport
While waiting for the bus, I ended up meting a man named Cyrus, who told me about how he is working to establish a chapter of Water Keepers in his locale of South Carolina. We talked about the trials and tribulations of building a non-profit presence, the horrors of over-development, and the evils of Large Corporations while we rode the bus, then went our separate ways upon reaching the airport.

Leg 4: White Plains to Detroit
After paying $1.50 for a candy bar, (and refusing to pay $9 for a sandwich) I got on the plane. There was a little delay with the takeoff, then a fair amount of turbulence from heavy cloud cover that the pilots skillfully navigated through and above, but I managed to doze off while reading my way through Digital Character Design and Painting, by Don Seegmiller.

To my credit, I managed to wake up just in time for juice and peanuts, as well as catching the eye of the fellow next to me, one John Velonis, who asked if I were an artist, and conversation ensued. He told me of the games that he had designed (like “Venus Needs Men!” which sounds like a fun time) and was in the process of designing, and I told him of the work that I’d done. Noticing his “Gamer For Life” shirt, explained that I was going to the con to meet and greet publishers and so on, and that I had a space in the Art Show. We talked of the games that we played, and he mentioned that he would be helping out at the Z-Man Games booth, and I said that I would stop by and demo with him. I did go looking for him, but we were apparently not meant to demo, as I kept missing him.

Leg 5: Detroit to Indianapolis:
While walking up to John to explain that my flight was “the later flight to Indiana,” I found myself introduced to Rone Barton of Atomic Array, RPG Countdown, and Open Design Podcast, along with another fellow whose name I can’t remember for the life of me, but he was an adventure writer. We talked for awhile, and as fate would have it, he was in the process of collecting artists for representation. I gave him my card. The four of us talked for awhile until it was time for them to board, and then I busied myself with finding my plane’s gate.

En route to the gate, I stopped in at the Online Cafe, and bought an imposing plate of nachos, along with some wireless access to while away the layover.

Nachos: $10, Internet: $7. Not a bad deal.

I also fielded some calls, most notably some mildly frantic calls from Jason Thompson of King of RPGs fame. Nothing major, but there was a definite sense of urgency.

Long story short: Through seven degrees of separation, I ended up being his go-to guy for postcard distribution at Gen Con. The only problem was that our mutual 7th-degree friend contacted me while I was about 20,000 feet in the air, and unable to receive calls, much less packages. Between the time difference and the last-minuteness of it all, it was pretty tight.

After this initial confusion was cleared up, Jason and I got things straightened out, and he rush-ordered a stack of postcards to the address I was staying at to arrive on Friday, so I could put them out on Saturday.

I hung around the airport until it was time to board, and arrived in Indy without further incident. My host picked me up without a hitch, and we went to the local art and craft stores in search of mats, so I could hang my artwork in the Art Show.

Despite the density of stores, there was little selection- or inventory of what I needed. It took trips to three separate stores to acquire a total of ten mats, and they didn’t even all match because they were different brands. The colors were close enough, so I did not complain. I picked up some Velcro dots as well, and we went home. We had a light dinner, and I spent the night listening to Three Days Grace and gluing my prints to mats, with a fair amount of success. Finally, I toddled off to bed.

It seems that the Little Debbie people got wind of my previous assessment of their expanded snack sizes, for a few months back, I received a gift of a box of new yellow cakes with butter creme icing. While this was not the appeasement that it sounds like, (the gift was from my mother) it’s good to know that someone out there is listening, or at the very least thinking along the same lines that I am.

Little Debbie Yellow Cakes. Not exactly the answer to my prayers, but I'll take it.

At any rate, compared to their leviathan cousins, the yellow cakes in question (which claim to possess not only ‘Fresh Taste’, but ‘Right Size’! as well,) the 100 Calorie Cakes are tiny, and I have the photographic evidence to prove it:

Framing this image was like trying to put the Hulk, Juggernaut, and a pygmy kitten all in the same frame.

It’s also interesting to note that since my last critique of the Little Debbie line of cakes, the prices of the larger-sized cakes have jumped again, now retailing at $.75 apiece, when less than a year ago they were $.25. However, the Oatmeal Creme Pie seems to have lost its second layer, for which I am actually quite grateful. Seriously, that was way too much to be justifiably called a single serving.

It may be shorter, but the Oatmeal Creme Pie is still bigger than life.

Getting back to the cakes of the day, the 100 Calorie Yellow Cakes were rather tasty, if small. The little cakes are small even compared to the older ‘small cakes‘ that Debbie has been making for so long, and those come twin-wrapped in a box of eight (or ten in some cases).

They are almost delicate, and not as sweet as the fare that Little Debbie usually provides. Because of this, (and probably also because of the programming that has me trained to bite unmercifully into anything that comes wrapped in cellophane) I found myself tearing through them without even realizing it.

They fit in the palm of your hand, even out of the wrapping.

Whether this is the result of clever marketing or purely accidental still remains to be seen. Nevertheless, these confections might go best with coffee or tea, at the end of a meal, as opposed to a standalone snack- they are too small and light to satisfy in cases of actual peckishness, but could easily fill the need for a sweet taste on the heels of something heavier.

On the whole, I approve of these cakes, although mostly for their intent. These non-monolithic cakes manage to be 100 calories without artificial sweeteners (as far as I can tell, anyway,) and still taste good, and even fill a niche in the world of snackery that their predecessors had long since ignored.

That is to say that they’re almost grown-up cakes when compared to the zanier (and more child-oriented) high-calorie cakes that had come before them, by the packaging alone, nevermind the smaller size and calorie count.

Say what you will about "second childhoods," these are some mighty fine cakes.

So, good job, Little Debbie. Keep on keeping on, and I can’t wait to see what else you shake out of your petticoats.

Not exactly "wafer thin," but you get the idea. That also happens to be my least favorite Monty Python sketch.

If you have been keeping up with the Sapo Entertainment Blog you would have caught my rant about turning over a new leaf. That new leaf includes the making updates on time and post comics on time. All that said check out my new blog post on this summers movie line up or lack there of.

We do have several announcements to make:

First is we will be starting two new comics the first one starting in July is called His and Hers, and a comic called Clandestine 470 that will make its appearance sometime before the end of summer.

Second we will be restarting the MegMan comic from the first issue and will appear every other Saturday starting either this Saturday or next Saturday. We will keep you posted.

If you want to stay on top of whats happening with Sapo Entertainment you can check us out on Twitter , Facebook or become a fan on our Facebook fan page.

Thanks
Sapo

I guess all I am saying is that this summer movies are bordering on the side of lame. The summer blockbuster fun started well in May (which does not really count since it is not summer yet) with two movies I enjoyed Startrek and Terminator Salvation I enjoyed both movie because they were well written and the acting was top notch. Since it is June I figured it would be too late to do a review. So that ship has sailed. Now June is coming to an end with the only “blockbuster” this month has been Transformers I do not have to go see this movie to tell you it is lame. It is directed by Michael Bay he does not believe in telling a story or movies with a plot. In this movie there will be lots of running lots of chasing and lots of unrealistic explosions.

What do I have to look forward too.?

Well according to the yahoo summer guide for July and August:

JULY

Public Enemies- Looks like a good movie to watch and it has Johnny Depp and Christian Bale in it.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince- I am not a fan of Harry Potter but so far I have enjoyed the movies.

AUGUST

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra – Even though my lame meter is going off on this one, I have to say Ray Parks as snake eyes is a great choice and I will give this movie a chance.

Then there is District 9, this movie looks hot, the website is hot and fun to play with. There is not much about the story out there yet. It does however have this Starship Troopers / Cloverfield vibe to it.

That is what Hollywood has to offer this summer. How can I remain positive when in my mind there is only one movie I even want to see this summer. Lets all go see District 9 coming out August 14, 2009.

1. 3D anything, until we have real 3D entertainment like the Danger Room or the Holodeck then we should give up with the 3D crap fest.

2. Comic book movies, they seem to be mostly misses but they keep getting made. Enough, they suck and I will not talk about it anymore. That’s what happens when you let Hollywood control the making of the movie.

3. Republicans I don’t understand them. Nuff said.

4. Bad television, Wait your going to cancel the Sarah Connor Chronicles, But you are going to keep 24. I guess that good writing is not what FOX is into.

I am very sure there is more I can gripe about, for now this will have to do. For this point on I will be only writing about stuff that works and I have enjoyed. ( I think this will last about six months I am think about starting a betting pool. )

Later
Sean

With the exception that the warriors had names, it might have been any other episode of DW. Nothing particularly innovative in terms of testing debuted, in the end it was a lot of cut meat and broken stuff, coupled with the standard macho posturing. From the beginning, the Zulu team was losing, and as far as I’m concerned, they knew it. The more that you have to explain how your fighter’s style would allow you to avoid/overcome your opponent’s blows, the less of an advantage you’ve got. This and other lessons played out over the course of the ancient warrior fights; if I can bring myself to watch the modern ones, then I’ll come back and compare. But for now, here’s a recap:

Apache vs. Gladiator

The one that started it all.

My Initial assessment:
Holy crap, this show is awesome. Look at that guy punch that cow carcass with that thing! What? Aww, he got hit with an arrow’ he loses? Nuts.

The lesson: Range wins Deadliest Warrior, and the simulated battle at the end takes a fair amount of artistic license, despite all the hard science leading up to it.

Ninja vs. Spartan

The image so nice, I used it twice.

My initial assessment:
This looks like another bad matchup of stealth versus strength. Take away the anime-style powers that real ninjas never had, and it seems to get worse. Perhaps the ninja will surprise us, but the Spartan seems to have more armor and a bigger shield than the Gladiator did, and I’m betting that the Spartan team will play up the shield-wall tactic.

The Aftermath: Armand Dorian said it best when he explained that ?the Ninja could hurt the Spartan, but he couldn’t kill the Spartan.’ The Ninja was a skirmisher, the Spartan was a tank. A tank that rolled over the Ninja and barely paused to stop in the face of black eggs and shiruken.

The lesson: Catastrophic amounts of damage win Deadliest Warrior. While this isn’t a factor a lot of the time, considering that most of the weapons maim or kill pretty obviously, when a team talks more about how their fighter would be moving around (the Ninja and Shaka teams did a lot of hard selling on that angle), or how tough their warrior would be, and/or how little the opponent’s just-recorded X-bajillion pounds of pressure would be laughed off (the Maori and Viking teams did a lot of hard selling in that regard), they’re probably losing. The Samurai team is a bit of an exception to this rule, however…

Viking vs. Samurai

If Fuji had been there, The Salt would have turned the tides.

My initial assessment:
This can’t end well for anyone. But it’ll probably be fun to watch. Either the Samurai knocks the Viking down with the one sword stroke that they are famous for, or the Viking goes berserk and lays into him with an axe.

The Aftermath: Like the Apache before him, the Samurai was an arguably better-trained warrior with a singular advantage- the bow and arrow. Katana vs.? Greataxe was pretty much irrelevant- both weapons were viciously effective. And in the weeks to come, range would prove more of a factor than anything else, whether it would take the form of a projectile, or a really long melee weapon.

The lesson: Range wins Deadliest Warrior, in case you’d forgotten.

Pirate vs. Knight

Scurvy againt Chivalry.

My Initial assessment:
Does the pirate have a pistol? If so, based solely on the severe advantage that the bow gave the Apache, the Pirate wins. I’m rooting for the Knight, though.

The Aftermath: The Pirate had 2 guns and a grenade.

A. GRENADE.

I cannot emphasize that enough. Even though the flintlock pistol was unable to penetrate the Knight’s armor, and the blunderbuss, well, blundered, the Pirate HAD A GRENADE! As far as non-powder weapons went, the Knight’s armor was more than effective, and the crossbow was comparable, but in the end, chivalry was truly dead.

The lesson: Technology wins Deadliest Warrior. Explosives also win Deadliest Warrior. Bullets win Deadliest Warrior as well, which is why I was disinterested in the modern warfare of Taliban vs. IRA, Yakuza vs. Mafia, and Green Beret vs. Spetznaz. It’s pretty obvious that guns kill people.

Maori Warrior vs. Shaolin Monk

Sleeper hit of the season.

My initial assessment:
I actually hadn’t been interested in this, and caught the repeat of it which played before Shaka Zulu vs. William Wallace. But it turned out to be an interesting matchup.

The Aftermath: The Maori weapons, while horrifyingly effective, were brittle, being made of animal parts and wood. How this affected the calculations of the final battle, I’ll never know, but in addition to that, the Shaolin’s twin hooks and chain were about twice the reach of the best that the Maori could bring to the table, on top of all his weapons being made of steel. In hindsight, this didn’t seem like a fair matchup.

The lesson: Technology (especially metallurgy) wins Deadliest Warrior. Range also wins Deadliest Warrior. Your warrior might laugh off some blows, but the gel gummies don’t lie. The fact that you might be moving around just means that you’ll lose a few more body parts before you go down.

William Wallace vs. Shaka Zulu

From Wikipedia!

My initial assessment:
This sounds ridiculous, and not necessarily in a bad way. However, since Wallace is known for shooting lightning bolts from his arse, I think that Zulu will not have much of a chance in this matchup.

The Aftermath: While the arse-lightning did not play a part in the combat, pretty much every thing that I’ve mentioned so far came true over the course of this (which would likely have been the most controversial show, if not for the Terrorist Jamboree airing on Sunday Night, or the kerfluffle that seemed to have arisen in the wake of Viking vs. Samurai,) came true. The Shaka team spent a lot of time insisting that Shaka would be able to get under Wallace’s guard and shank him up, and played up the only advantage that they had- the range of the Iwisa, a wooden mace that could be thrown some 30 feet.

The lesson: There’s no real lesson here; it’s just the final exam.

Based on these assessments, and my own desire to determine who truly is the Deadliest Warrior, here is a brief rundown of what would happen if there had been a bracket system (and who knows, perhaps there is something in the works for next season. I’ve got my fingers crossed.)

Apache faces off with Spartan. Spartan uses his large shield to protect himself from Apache’s storm of arrows, closes and goes to town on Apache. Being considerably more heavily armored and better-trained than the Gladiator, the Spartan finishes the Apache with a blow from his shield, followed by a spear thrust to the lower spine. Spartan advances to Round 3.

Samurai faces off with Pirate. Pirate throws a grenade at Samurai. Samurai explodes. Pirate advances to Round 3.

William Wallace faces off against Shaolin Monk. The claymore is deadlier than the whip chain, and has almost the same reach as the linked twin hooks. Combine that with chainmail and the targe shield, and Wallace takes Round 2 pretty easily, scoring a bye in Round 3, because he’s William Wallace and can name-drop, where the others are just stereotypes.

Spartan faces Pirate. Pirate shoots Spartan. Spartan armor, even the shield, is not as advanced as French plate, so Spartan keels over dead. Pirate might have to shoot him twice, but no grenade.

Pirate advances to finals to face William Wallace, and throws a grenade at him. Wallace lumbers through it. Pirate then shoots him twice, and Wallace dies.

Result: Pirate is the Deadliest Warrior, at least in the Ancient bracket. If you were to put a Green Beret in front of him, while he’s fumbling with flint and steel to light the fuse on his grenade, a magazine’s been emptied into his gut, spilling rum everywhere.

Pretty much sums it up.Pirate image (the same one as above) by Marcus Ranum (http://www.ranum.com ), bombs by woodsy.

I’ll see you in two weeks. Now that I’ve got nothing to watch on TV again, maybe I’ll find something else to talk about by then.